HACKED BY CYBER-ATTACK - ALPERENBTN

[Big John]

Humans existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers.

They lived on deer in the mountains and plains during the summer & would go to the coast and live on fish in winter.

The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups: Liberals and Conservatives.

Once beer was discovered it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early human ancestors were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the "Conservative movement."

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQs and doing the sewing, fetching and hair dressing. This was the beginning of "the Liberal movement".

Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as 'girliemen.'

Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of
cats, the invention of group therapy and group hugs, and the concept of "politicians" deciding how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided.

Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant.

Liberals are symbolized by the jackass. You make the connection.

Modern liberals like imported beer, but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.

Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, anglers, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, most corporate executives, Marines, athletes and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to "govern" the producers and decide what to do with their production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tame and created a business of trying to get MORE for nothing.


Gee, here comes a developer to town who wants alot of SOMETHING for NOTHING!
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Give a man a fish, feed him for a day.

Teach a man to fish, he'll be broke and hungry the rest of his life!

John Sullivan
Native Corpus Christian
Currently Displaced in San Antonio

[mastergunner]

This is why you wear the white srhimper boots, one day I may be so worthy.
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Hardheads should be the state fish of Texas

[captfrankie]

Hey I like the way you think.It was explained to me like this.Conservatives/Repulicans want you to keep your money and decide how you'd like to spend it.Liberals/Democrats want you to send your money to the "GOVERNMENT" and let them decide how they want to spend it.
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Life is Good

[Bluffer]

You forgot Liberals took all the milkmen jobs. Ideal for milking for freebies off the govt! while the working class paid taxes to support them!!
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Fish hard, fish the Bluff. Surrounded by water!
-A quaint little drinking village with a fishing problem-

[Guest]

I knew them damn Liberals were Potlickers!

[Flyfisher]

This is how to explain the difference to your kids:

FATHER DAUGHTER TALK

A young woman was about to finish her first year of college. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be a very liberal Democrat, and was very much in favor of the redistribution of wealth.

She was deeply ashamed that her father was a rather staunch Republican, a feeling she openly expressed.

Based on the lecture that she had participated in, and the occasional chat with a professor, she felt that her father had for years harbored an evil selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his.

One day she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the addition of more government welfare programs. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professor had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father.

He responded by asking how she was doing in school.

Taken aback, she answered rather haughtily that she had a 4.0 GPA, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew. She didn't even have time for a boyfriend, and didn't really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying.

Her father listened and then asked, "How is you friend Audrey doing?"

She replied, "Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, she never studies, and she barely has a 2.0 GPA. She is so popular on campus, college for her is a blast.

She's always invited to all the parties, and lots of times she doesn't even show up for classes because she's too hung over."

Her wise father asked his daughter, "Why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct a 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who only has a 2.0.

That way you will both have a 3.0 GPA and certainly that would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA."

The daughter, visibly shocked by her father's suggestion, angrily fired back,

"That wouldn't be fair! I have worked really hard for my grades! I've invested a lot of time, and a lot of hard work!

Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree.

She played while I worked my tail off!"

The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, "

Welcome to the the Republican Party!"

[bobaloo1]

Amen!!

[REDFISHER]

[Salt Water]

Let the truth ring out!
That is some ot the best reading I've had in a long time.
Yahoo, Longhorns.
Eddie

[SurfRanger95]

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"I don't wanna live on that kind of island, no I don't wanna swim in a roped off sea. It's too much for me, too much for me; I gotta be where the wind and the water are free." -- Jimmy Buffet

"GUINESS IS GOOD FOR YOU!"

[Dexter]

Kinky Friedman for Govenor of Texas! I am not a republican.

[Bluffer]

[Graham]

I thought this forum was about fishing...never mind. All of us always have to divide no matter where we are. Jeeesh.

[Big John]

[Graham]

I know what you sayin man. It's just that this beach issue transcends freakin' politics. I know libertarians, republicans, democrats...Kinky Friedman supporters who want the beach open. When we had the signing for the petition up at TAMUCC all sorts of people supported it, and you know what, it brought us togeather. It didn't matter what "party" we were with, we had common ground and that was enough. The dang politicos love it when we call ourselves under their lables, becuase it divides us more than they do.

Keep the beaches open!

Thats my line and I'm stickin to it.